Daperture

Perhaps this isn't the most appropriate place to expose certain incriminating tendencies, but writing nurtures a thought process that ultimately aids my mental and emotional growth.

The Story
This thought starts with the anecdote: I had been resting in the peaceful serenity of home following work, though there were household duties to tend to. Furthermore, there was a tenant who was coming to claim residence in a room and such commencement of residence should be welcomed with an uncluttered shared space, lest I offend on first impressions. Yet I didn't necessarily see the mass of bathing dishes and free-laying laundered clothing too much of a deterrent to my charming first impressions.

Of course, time has it's way of slowing and speeding down in lamentable proportion to the most inopportune moments. In this case, 5:30 to 7:10 passed by in just moments when I was greeted with the ambivalently delightful or disgruntled ding, pronouncing that I should have spent the last hour tidying up rather than exploring the vast potential of Neural Networks.

The tenant's stay was brief, but following her departure, I found myself tidying the dishes and laundry with such a motivation that I would not have been able to call my own just an hour ago.

Theory
My thoughts ran about and suggested that perhaps the reason why we procrastinate is based on our personal reality of the consequences of fulfilling our duties in preparation for deadlines, events, etc. Although I can logically conclude that x, y and z need to be finished before a given event, somehow my mind doesn't register, or better said, it's in denial that such an event is about to occur. As an impending deadline reaches closer or has passed, that's when personal urgencies are elevated and the power of motivation kicks in or not. Perhaps there needs to be an alignment of accountability, ownership and consequence, which motivates one to action. Finally experiencing any consequences whether harsh or light, my denial of the reality turns a corner and acts in accordance with what I deem my contractual obligations.

So to entertain a thought, we procrastinate because we don't believe in certain outcomes, though it may be a harsh assessment (of course we believe certain events will happen), it makes sense why in an urgent situation an email is far less urgent than say an angry phone call. Things aren't real until we've experienced an angry voice, urgent body language, binding handshake or have actually taken ownership of the situation. I might theorize that in this digital age of digital, emoticon-compensated-emotionless communication, old-fashioned human interaction has a tremendous effort in making things real.

Evidence
When I got my first tenant, I handled all the details of the tenancy. With this reality, I worked day and night to repaint the living quarters and clean up, while my girlfriend tended to her personal responsibilities. This time around, my girlfriend handled the human-interaction part in this contract, while I stayed on the sidelines. What was different or consistent this time was that she followed through on clearing the space to be occupied, rather than me. I don't think that being passed messages from my girlfriend didn't quite register the reality of ownership of the situation until I met the tenant face-to-face and realized, "oh, this is real!"

Other Related Thoughts
On another note, I'd have to say that accountability, ownership and consequence fuel desire in a primary and secondary way.

While reading an interview with Warren Buffet, I was moved by his statement about power efficiencies in relation to people. His metaphoric question asked, (when asking about investing in people) "Would you rather net 50hp from a 500hp engine or 250hp from a 300hp engine, because in a race, the 300hp engine will win." It triggered the why being a person of action and dependability was so important. So often, I have heard many stories about people with such great talent who amount to nothing time and time again, only because they were 1000hp people who understood they "could" net 1000hp if they wanted, but that arrogance led to their 50hp life.

How does motivation which consists of personal desire, accountability, ownership and consequence relate to an individual's power efficiency? Perhaps my mind united two disparate thoughts because an individual's power efficiency is tantamount to desire. One who has strong desires goes out and does what they want to do. They act.

I am happy to say that my writing is my action. My writing is my foray into philosophizing and digesting the details of life.